Maintaining Success is Tough

About a month ago I got a 2 day flu. Unfortunately it was accompanied by a migraine - first one in over a year. My husband took me to the local Med 7, which I used to frequent regularly when the migraines were a consistent part of my life. As I laid on the table in the exam room trying to will away the nausea and wait for the doctor, I thought how much I really DIDN'T miss this scenario. I truly believe the migraines stopped when I had established a consistent cardio routine. A few years ago, I was lethargic but yearning to be active. It took a long time to achieve my goals, but it finally happened. Now, honestly, I'm a bit phobic of losing it. I don't want to go back to where I was with my health and lifestyle, but I know that it can happen if I get too lax.

When I worked for the drug rehab program, several participants would come to class frightened, telling me they had a dream last night that they used (drugs), which was so real that they were truly afraid they would get a positive drug test the next day. I learned that's a normal reaction in recovery, to know you've come so far but still afraid that you could instantly lose it again. I believe losing weight and learning how to change your lifestyle is quite similar to recovering from drug or any other all encompasing addiction. I thought about the 'recovery dream' when I had one. I was dreaming I was looking at myself in a mirror. My reflection showed me with all the weight back on. I looked at myself directly and I was thin, but back in the mirror I was heavy. I thought to myself, "I wonder if everyone else sees me this way? But this isn't how I really am anymore". I woke up and immediately checked myself out in a (real) mirror - just in case.

I'm very focused on making it to the gym at least 2-3 times a week and try to even out my calories each week. If I eat a lot of 'not so good' things on the weekend, I need to lower my calories and get really strict for a few days during the next week to even my weight out again. I learned I can gain weight very fast, and if I want to maintain, I need to remain dilligent and disciplined. I enjoy my healthier lifestyle now and can't imagine why I wasted so much time in letting myself be unhealthy. I think human nature is that we will always opt to take the path of least resistance , so for any major lifestyle change, it can be a battle at times. But so worth it.